


you give me feelings (never felt before.)

by collidecolours



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/F, clexa au, lil idiots in love and they dont even know it, theyre both just so damn gay bless up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-06
Updated: 2016-06-06
Packaged: 2018-07-12 18:19:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7117306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/collidecolours/pseuds/collidecolours
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><em>Standing in front of Lexa is similar to speaking in front of a class for a presentation. Her stomach flips and it’s difficult to form coherent sentences without thinking hard enough. Clarke feels all kinds of nervous and she’s not sure why — she only just met her but something feels different. A good different.</em><br/> </p><p>Clarke moves into her new apartment and Lexa gets a new neighbour.</p>
            </blockquote>





	you give me feelings (never felt before.)

It’s moving day. Clarke’s both excited and scared at the thought of living alone, but being twenty-two years old — it’s the right time. Clarke’s sitting on the last of the boxes to take to the rented truck outside, she needs a moment to take it all in; to breathe. Her childhood room now empty, she lets her eyes wander to the door frame that still has her heights throughout the years drawn on the side with black marker. Abby used to measure her every month until Jake died and everything got quiet — everything changed.

“Clarke?” Abby calls from the bottom of the stairs. “Raven’s ready to go.”

Clarke stands up and walks over to the window, she looks outside and sees her best friend Raven sitting in the driver's seat ready to go. “Coming,” she calls back.

She strolls to the middle of the room and picks up the last box full of all her old sketchbooks and painting equipment from college and high-school. Clarke knows it’s time to say goodbye to her Mom, and she knows it won’t be easy. They’ve both been each other’s rock since Clarke’s Dad passed away. She meanders down the stairs with the heavy box clutched to her chest and drops it at the door. She turns around to see her Mom with a tear falling down one of her cheeks.

“Mom,” Clarke says as she walks over to her and embraces her in a tight hug. “It’s okay, I’ll be okay,” she mutters into her mother’s chest.

“I know,” Abby sighs. “Promise me you’ll keep in touch?” Abby holds Clarke’s face in her hands and looks at her daughter with a serious expression.

Clarke feels a tear of her own escape and she nods. “I will, Mom. I promise.”

Abby leans forward to kiss her forehead lightly — lingering for a few seconds longer than usual, but Clarke doesn’t complain.

“Okay. Go, go, go. Before Raven drives off without you,” Abby laughs lightly.

Clarke smiles and releases Abby from their hug, she turns on her heel to walk toward the door, picking up the box. “Bye, Mom,” she waves.

“Bye, Clarke,” Abby whispers as Clarke closes the door.

Clarke swipes at the tears on her face and makes her way to the truck, putting the last of the boxes in the back and tugging the shutter closed. She makes her way over to the passenger side and climbs in. Raven looks at her with a sympathetic expression and Clarke rolls her eyes.

“Not you too,” Clarke mumbles but a smile sneaks across her lips.

“You wish — I’d never shed a tear for you, Griffin,” Raven replies as she starts the engine and begins to drive.

But as they drive off, Clarke sees her best friend swat at an unwanted tear on her cheek.

*

Lexa’s in her apartment, she’s marking a few of her student’s essays since it’s spring break and she doesn’t have much else to do. She always wanted to teach, to help expand the mind of people — help them to understand things they might not have before. That’s why she decided to be a Lecturer in Politics and Law, two subjects that can really help to change the world; or at least improve it.

Before Lexa can continue with the essays, she hears a familiar knock on the door. The knock of her sister Anya, since they were young they always had this secret knock — one that only they knew. Lexa gets up to answer the door, unlocking it and rolling her eyes at her sister who has a takeout bag in one hand. Knowing Anya knows her too well.

“Don’t roll your eyes at me,” Anya mocks. “You know you wouldn’t have eaten if I didn’t bring this. So here, take it.” She shoves the bag into Lexa’s chest and brushes past her to enter Lexa’s apartment.

“You didn’t have too,” Lexa responds — but she knows her sister’s right. She gets so caught up in work sometimes she just forgets.

“Whatever you say,” Anya replies sarcastically. She walks into Lexa’s kitchen and begins to take out some plates from one of the cupboards for the food. “Got anything to drink?”

Lexa arrives in the kitchen and places the food on the table that sits in the middle of the room. “What kind?”

Anya turns to look at Lexa and crosses her arms. “I broke up with my girlfriend last week, what do you think?”

“Vodka?”

“Sounds delicious,” Anya responds.

Anya and Echo were together for around a year, it wasn’t the perfect relationship but they loved each other. But if Lexa’s being honest — seeing how heartbroken her sister is after the breakup, it puts her off the whole ‘being in love’ thing. There was Costia, her high-school sweetheart who Lexa did love; wholeheartedly. But life got in the way and college happened, their colleges were hours away from each other so they tried long distance. But Costia fell in love with someone else within the first year.

Since then, Lexa steers clear from Love — from feelings. It spares her the pain. But that doesn’t mean she didn’t have fun in college.

“Earth to Lexa,” Anya says, waving one of her hands in front of Lexa’s face. Breaking her reverie. “Should we watch movies or play some video games?”

Lexa walks into her living room with the food and Anya follows, slumping onto the sofa. “Watch something while we eat then play video games after?”

“This is why I love you, sis.”

Lexa rolls her eyes — a habit she can’t help around Anya. “But then I have to get back to work.”

“Are you kicking me out?” Anya reaches over to the takeout bag and pulls out a container with Thai food, then places it on a plate.

Lexa takes a seat on the sofa, bringing Anya’s legs to rest on her lap. “You could say that.”

They watch a few tv programmes and then play a few video games, which always ends up the same way. Both of them getting extremely serious and competitive — even though it is just a soccer game.

“Hey! You can’t do that!” Anya exclaims, throwing her hands in the air with a loud huff.

“I just did,” Lexa says — eyes concentrated on the screen.

Anya pauses the game. “I’m not playing. You’re a chea—”

“No I’m not, Anya. You’re just bad.”

Anya takes the vodka bottle from the table and pours a shot, backing it quickly and making a face at the sour taste. “Fuck you.” She takes another shot.

Lexa gets up and goes back over to her papers, but before she can sit down, Anya’s on her case.

“You’re not gonna drink with your poor heartbroken sister?” Anya pouts.

Lexa takes a seat on the sofa across from her, piling all the papers into her lap. “Nope.”

“Fine,” she replies. “Hey, who’s moving in next door?”

Lexa’s eyebrows knit together — then she remembers a few months ago when her neighbours moved out. Thank God, they were loud to say the least. “No idea, probably an old couple or something.”

“Not your style then,” Anya teases.

Lexa puts her glasses on to read the papers. “Not at all.”

*

“Thanks, Griffin.” Raven takes the food from Clarke’s hands. They stopped at a gas station to use the bathroom so Clarke decided it was also a good time for snacks. “It’s not far now, probably twenty minutes,” Raven says. Mouth full of chips.

Clarke chuckles at her friend. “I’m pretty sure you just spat a chip at me.”

“I’m pretty sure I didn—” Raven spits by accident. “My bad.”

Clarke brushes her shoulder and shoves Raven’s. “Let’s go, I don’t want this thing to break down before we get there.”

Raven shoves another handful of chips into her mouth. “Well, it’s a good thing I’m a mechanic isn’t it?” She says with a smug grin, then starts the engine again and drives off.

“You’re staying over right?” Clarke asks. It’d be nice to not sleep alone on the first night, plus Raven only lives a couple of minutes away from her now so it wouldn’t be a hassle for her getting home tomorrow.

“Of course, Clarke,” Raven responds with her eyes focused on the road. “Couldn’t just leave my best friend alone on the first night, could I?”

“Speaking of, I should probably text Octavia and tell her to leave.” Clarke pulls out her phone and texts her. Octavia lives close too, It’s like the three of them can never get rid of each other, just the way Clarke likes it.

When Clarke’s Dad died the two girls were nothing but best friends to Clarke. Remaining patient with her and being there when she needed them; always. Last year was a pretty bad period in Clarke’s life, the loss of her father and breaking up with Finn hit her hard. Harder than she could have ever expected.

“Tell her to bring some extra blankets, she’s not sharing mine,” Raven says.

“You know you will, Raven.”

Clarke knows Raven has a soft spot for Octavia, she always has. Ever since Clarke introduced her to Octavia in College — she’s always had a soft spot for her.

Raven rolls her eyes and continues to focus on the road. “Okay, we’re nearly there — I’ll just park at that corner,” she says pointing into the distance. “Hey, there’s O. Ugh, she’s with Bell.”

Clarke looks over at Raven with her brows raised. “Jealous?”

“If my hands weren’t on this wheel, I’d punch you.”

Clarke giggles and undoes her seatbelt when Raven parks the truck. She jumps out before her best friend can actually punch her, strolling over to Octavia and Bellamy.

“Hey, Bellamy. What brings you here?” Clarke questions with her hands on her hips.

“Octavia needed a ride, and I kinda wanted to snoop around your new place too,” he laughs lightly.

“Hi Octavia, how are you? I’m good thanks Clarke, how are—”

Clarke pulls the girl in for a hug before she can continue with her sarcasm. “I’m happy you came, O.”

“I got your back, Clarke,” she smiles and rubs Clarke’s back.

Clarke pulls away and looks over at the truck, watching Raven unload a few boxes. “We should probably help before she gets cranky.”

“I second that,” Octavia says, walking over to Raven.

“Me too,” Bellamy agrees.

*

“Anya, let’s get you to sleep,” Lexa whispers at her drunk sister.

“Why’d she leave me, Lex?” Anya slurs.

Lexa grabs a blanket that was hanging over the sofa and drapes it over sister. “I don’t know, someone else will come along,” she says. “I promise.”

“I’m gonna try to be like you. I’m not gonna let anyone in,” Anya says. Her eyes fluttering shut slowly.

Lexa’s heart drops at her sister’s words. She wouldn’t want her sister to do that — Lexa doesn’t do it on purpose, it’s just how she is and she doesn’t recommend it. “Okay, Anya.”

Within a few seconds Anya’s already asleep and snoring lightly. Lexa strolls back over to the over sofa and marks the last paper she has left. When she’s done, she goes into her room and changes into some sweats and a loose shirt. She hears some rustling and noises next door and she has a confused expression on her face, are the new neighbours moving in already?

Lexa takes off her glasses and places them on her bedside table — she slips on some shoes and makes her way to the door. Maybe they are old people who need help moving in.

Stepping outside and into the hall, she sees a group of people who are roughly her age carrying large boxes into the apartment next to hers. Deciding they probably don’t need her help she turns to go back inside.

“Hey!” A voice calls over to her. “I think I’m your new neighbour.”

Lexa nearly rolls her eyes at the enthusiasm on the girl behind hers voice. That’s until she turns around.

“Uh— hey,” Lexa takes in the girl in front of her. Blue eyes, pink lips and dark eyelashes. Her blonde hair loose around her shoulders, resting on her black leather jacket. “I’m Lexa,” she extends her hand out for the mysterious girl to shake.

“Clarke,” she replies shaking her hand. A smile on her lips.

Lexa’s eyes travel over Clarke’s body — she’s not subtle about it either. “So, need any help?” She says, her eyes meeting blue once again.

“That’d be nice actually, I think there’s only a few things left,” Clarke says as they both begin to walk outside, passing her apartment. “So, do you live on your own?”

Lexa smirks. “Eager are we?”

“N—no. I—” Clarke blushes furiously.

“I was joking, Clarke,” Lexa grins and Lexa hasn’t done that in a while. Smiled until she feels her cheeks hurt. It’s a foreign expression now. “But yeah I do.”

Clarke attempts to smile. “Uh, cool. Me too.”

They reach the truck and Lexa notices the people she saw taking the boxes inside are lingering around the truck. She politely smiles at them and brushes a strand of loose hair behind her ear.

“Guys, this is, Lexa. She’s my new neighbour.” Clarke gestures at Lexa with a smile on her face.

“Hey, I’m Raven,” a brunette girl says to Lexa and then gestures to the others next to her. “This is Bellamy and Octavia — they’re brother and sister and a real pain in the ass.”

“Hey!” The other girls shoves Raven playfully and the guy just laughs.

“Hi, nice to meet you all,” Lexa replies with a tight-lipped smile.

“Lexa’s gonna help us bring some stuff up, how much is left?” Clarke interrupts walking over to the truck.

“There’s two left. You two can bring those up right? We’re gonna grab some food — want anything?”

“Uh, just grab me whatever you’re getting.”

“No problem,” Raven says as they begin to walk in the other direction.

*

They both move the last boxes up into Clarke’s apartment and Clarke’s struggling at a conversation starter since she embarrassed herself last time.

“Clarke, I really was just joking before, you seem really tense. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable in any way,” Lexa says while standing in the middle of Clarke’s empty kitchen. Her voice echoing against the bare walls.

Clarke likes the way her name sounds on Lexa’s tongue. “No— I’m not uncomfortable at all,” Clarke lies. She wouldn’t want her to think she’s uncomfortable because Lexa’s a girl. That’s not a problem at all. “How long have you lived here?”

Lexa nods and gives Clarke a small smile. “Only for 8 months actually,” she replies. “It’s nice. You’ll like it here.”

Standing in front of Lexa is similar to speaking in front of a class for a presentation. Her stomach flips, and it’s difficult to form coherent sentences without thinking hard enough. Clarke feels all kinds of nervous and she’s not sure why — she only just met her but something feels different. A good different.

“I think I will too,” Clarke replies. “The view from my window seems nice. It would be nice to paint.”

“You’re an artist?” Lexa asks.

“Uh, yeah.” Clarke doesn’t want to seem egotistical so she doesn’t mention that her paintings are held in galleries all over the city. She also doesn’t want Lexa to ask her the same question everyone else does: “So you’re rich?” Because no. She’s not. Her paintings are popular and many people buy them but sometimes there’s dry spells, and that means less money. Just like most people’s jobs.

“That sounds nice — I’d love to see your stuff one day,” Lexa says and clasps her hands behind her back.

“I’d love to show you,” Clarke responds before she can stop herself.

They stand in silence for a few moments before Clarke hears the voices of her friends in the hallway.

“I should probably go. I’ve got a heartbroken sister to look after and dishes to clean.”

Clarke smiles and drives a hand through her blonde hair. “It was nice meeting you.”

“You too, Clarke.” Lexa walks toward the unlocked and open door then turns her head. “Knock if you need anything.”

“Same to you.” Clarke watches her go and smiles at her friends who walk in. “What’d you get?”

“She seems nice,” Raven says ignoring Clarke.

“Uh huh,” Clarke responds and rummages through the bags her friends brought in.

“She’s hot too,” Octavia adds and Bellamy nods.

Clarke stands straight and folds her arms. “What’s your point?”

“You should totally…” Bellamy says. “You know.”

Clarke’s eyebrows knit together. “I don’t, actually.”

“Tap that ass,” Raven says suggestively — wiggling her eyebrows.

Clarke feels a blush travel up from her neck to her cheeks. “Guys, stop.”

“Fine. But don't come crying to me when you need a wing woman,” Raven sighs playfully.

"I wouldn’t need your help anyway,” she says smugly.

But Clarke’s not really thinking about Lexa like that. Not in that way anyway. Not that she wouldn’t mind—

Clarke shakes her head at her train of thought.

It’s just Clarke’s had trouble opening herself up to people since everything that happened last year. She has her walls up — and they’ve never really been up before. But Clarke thinks that if she keeps them up, she’ll be impervious to pain. But something about Lexa… something about her that Clarke can’t quite put her finger on makes Clarke want to tear those walls down.

**Author's Note:**

> drop a comment if you'd want me to continue!  
> \- elizajanetaylr.tumblr.com


End file.
